Blogging

I’m thinking about blogging. I hate that word…
Blog.
It’s sounds like something that rolled out of your ass and got stuck in your carpet. And there it began festering, as you moved out and moved on. The vines snaked through the windows, exciting the weeds, and the first roots began up heaving the floorboards. The house crumbled and caved in. Cars quit traveling in the vicinity and the roads became barren.
Years passed by. The dirt became somewhat marshy and the moisture collected in pools.
And there, in the center of it all, proudly and offensively sat your Blog.
Remember the old days, when you just discovered free email and it was the most amazing thing to send your friend a message by typing and clicking a button? Then, somehow through search engines, you discovered free websites.
Your own personal space. They had their own templates to help get you started. But when you used them, they looked so hideous that you sought out sites to help you learn your own “html” code. Draac.com and Java scripts galore. So many countless hours just to get your personality on the web and make it look pleasing.
I had one at Geocities, before they merged into Yahoo, still do (http://www.geocities.com/anotherpill). And I frequented Draac.com’s tutorials and colour charts and researched fun little Java scripts to make eyeballs float around my screen set off by killer new backgrounds saved in the midst of mad browsing. Tables and frames made your menus look swell.
And now you get myspace and blogspots…is there any comparison? Personalize your very own space that looks like each and everybody else’s! Get more friends! Put up the most popular bands! Viruses and spam! This background picture is so unique, 5 million other people have it! Now post your forwards in our bulletin section for all your senseless friends to see! They’ll post and repost it back and ask you what celebrity you look like! You can even advertise that you’re a hellacious swinger! Oh boy, I can hardly wait to get more requests!!!
I miss the old websites that you actually used to be able to customize. Make your own template. Choose your own adventure… But then again, I like doing things myself. And I hate people stuck in the undertow of society.
Oh, look, I just blogged again.

Blog rolls down stairs,
Alone or in pairs,
And over your neighbors dog.
It’s great for a snack,
It fits on your back,
It’s blog! blog! blog!

It’s blog! It’s blog!
It’s big, it’s heavy, it’s words.
It’s blog! It’s blog!
It’s better than bad, it’s good.

Everyone wants a blog!
You’re gonna love it, blog!
Come on and get your log
Everyone needs a blog
blog blog blog

My god, this is sick…

~ by redredjeremy on May 25, 2008.